The Self Takes A Back Seat

Been too lazy to update.

Highlights of the week include an easy night out with old friends.

The jokes, the banter. It was most definitely much missed. Even if is was just for a short while.

I want to do it again but I know that I'll probably have to wait a long while.

Also started back on the Mic Studio trail. Due to negative external circumstances outside of Mic, this might very well be the last student advisors' project.It depends on future events happening but they do look likely to happen. At this point we're just waiting for the moment to arrive.

There are a few internal matters that we need to watch out for, that we need to deal with from a managerial point of view. But those are internal issues and should remain as such and should not be discussed on a public platform like my blog.

The Jabbawockeez are killin' it every week so far on America's Best Dance Crew and I hope the win in next week's finale.

Hoping to get a compilation video at the end of it all.

Last week also saw a (proverbial) dagger struck in my heart. After the initial stab, a 'hand' took the hilt of the dagger and dragged it diagonally across my body. It didn't happen. But it sure felt that way.

As a result of that, maybe I saw the light.

I need to be less selfish. Sometimes, my happiness doesn't matter. It doesn't matter when the happiness of those very dear to you are at stake and their happiness is all that matters.

I know that God is a benevolent being that does not hate or harm. But He does make life a struggle and it should be no different for me. Plus, I personally feel that I don't deserve the treatment of the blessed since I'm hardly able to call myself pious. A fact that haunts me and quite frankly, a fact I'd like to change for my own benefit.

But today was the figurative equivalent of being kicked in the gonads (balls, testicles) while the abovementioned dagger was still in my body.

Again, it didn't happen. But it sure felt that way.

But, I must remember to be less selfish. It doesn't matter that I'm down. Sometimes, what matters is not my own heart but the fact that others are well-taken care of.

So, when you look now, all you'll see is a smile on my face.And I mean it with the truest and most honest strain of sincerity.

Why?

Again, it's because I think I need to be less selfish. I don't matter. You do.