Learning From The Past To Help The Future

Back from the sleepover in school.Knackered again.Slept at 230am and woke up around 715am.Not too bad.Room was way too cold though.Filming day is on Friday so I'm gonna be exempt from school the whole day then.A 2nd sleepover in school on Thursday night.

**** its tiring.Whatever happened to being slack?

I want my break.I want to concentrate on studying.And I want my scholarship money so I can splash cash to reward myself for the stress.Nothing wrong with being self-indulgent every once in a while.

On my way back from school and passing through the mall nearby,I ran into my old secondary school Maths teacher.It brought back memories.It made me appreciate him more now.He may not have been my favourite teacher.I mean he was just alright.But I acknowledge the fact that he tried to make me love Maths as a subject and to understand it.

Even though,I failed him by not making it,I was thinking back about a buried goal of mine.

One day,when I have the luxury and time to do so,I will revisit O Level Maths or even Secondary Maths,irregardless of the syllabus and pass well(at least a B) so that I can be proud that I exorcised one of my demons.

He may not know it but even though he failed cos I failed,he did make me realise the joy of overcoming obstacles and imbue with the realisation that I'm not gonna give up on this.One day,when I can,I will do it again.

I finally managed to pinpoint the reason why I might be reluctant to buy birthday prezzies for Roswell Girl.

It dawned on me that I still was unclear about her status now.Is she back with her old flame? The thing is,I'm not sure she knows either.So,I was worried that it would be too strong a message simply because of how it would look I did what I did while she had a guy.

Conscensus on what I should do seems to be that I should get all 3 prezzies.Just what a friend should do at least.I just thought of disguising the Mrs Fields' cookie/brownie gift as prezzies for Roswell Girl and a classmate cum projectmate,whose birthday is tomorrow.

It makes the whole 3 prezzie thing more safe to execute.Questions will be raised if/undoubtedly will be when Roswell Girl gets 3 prezzies whilst the rest get nothing more than sincere well-wishing.It is because of this that I'm afraid of Roswell Girl's reaction.

Of course,I could give the prezzies when the rest are not around.This would mean that I would have to look for windows of opportunity.

Anyways,these tiring two days have been put in prespective by the goal of O Level Maths.I'm working hard now so that maybe I would be in a blessed position that would allow me to persur that goal.

Looking back at where I was when my old teacher was part of my daily life in school and comparing that to where I am now,I feel that I've grown,in a metaphorical sense.I just wonder if he would have been proud of the things I'm doing now.It's the same as asking yourself whether you would be proud of yourself if in the future,you look back at the things you are doing now.

Every once in a while.A scent catches my nose.It's Roswell Girl's scent.Her perfume.The one that she had on when I went out with her the other time.Remembering it makes me happy at such a pleasant thought but makes me miss her.

She smells good in that scent.