Driving Me Up The Wall

Frustration doesn't even begin to describe how I'm feeling now.Well actually it does just about cover it but at the same time it feels like so much more.I don't really which way to go now but at the same time again,I feel like I'm in familiar territory.

Who or what exactly am I talking about?....Roswell Girl.

She's driving me nuts,she's in my head and she's not even aware of what she's doing to me.I even dream about her loads and I mean dream like...when I'm asleep not just daydreams.

The confusion is all added by the fact that MJ has virtually gone incognito and all I heard is that she just wants to be just friends.Not exactly the news that I want to hear.

But despite all that,doesn't Roswell Girl already have this new guy that she's interested in? If I already know that, how come I seem to 'forget' that fact whenever I'm around her? The same fact comes back to haunt me whenever I'm away from her...

I hate the fact that she's got my heart on a string (nice phrase!)

MJ's not interested in me,she just wants to be friends.I also hate that fate's brought me so close and so high with Roswell Girl and then slams me back down to earth with more cold,hard feel of reality.

Why am I so hung up over her? I am fully aware that I am and I'm doing my best to curb it.There's also MJ but that's another heartache for another day.Finding it difficlut to put emotions to words,just like most guys but damn,it sure is alot of emotion.

What's going on...not in the prime state of mind here.Whole lotta whatta,wanna and nah-uhhs buzzing about in my head.

It may sound undesirable but I think that it will be for my own good that I forget about her as soon as I can.Bad news is that relapses are likely given the fact that I have to see her for another year before she will be out of my life,out of my sight and out of my mind.Doesn't make sense that I'm chasing away a beautiful unicorn but that unreachable unicorn will cause me a lot of distress.

Just humour me for a moment here.Why do people fall in love? When all they do later is fall out of love.Falling out of love sucks.Question is,does it suck enough to avoid falling in love? Is it even possible?

I think not.

Ay! Amore!