What Is To Love?

Kind of nice to to come home with no one else around.I could kind of chill out and just do my own thing instead of having to put up with a cacaphony of noise blaring out of the TV.

Midterms are a month away.Seems quite a while away but I think it would be better if I were to spread things out.

I've already been given topics that I can choose from for my exposition essay.Think I'm gonna do "The Influence Of Music".

=)

This form of writing is a bit tricky but I think I need to adjust to the style.The nauseating part is that we are going to have to do research on it.

2 other projects in the offing,yet to be announced but I'm bound to be swamped soon enough so I figure I had better start midterm revisions sooner rather than later.That said,I'll start with MacroEcons chapter 1 after this post.

Thank God the dreams stopped.They really weren't helping me forget.I know what they say about how these things are a part of the subconscious but c'mon,I know that the reality that I'm facing is very much different.

At first I didn't wanna say anything cos people may think that I'm boasting or whatever.But I'm not and it doesn't really matter if ither thing I am cos that's not my intention.

A couple of months back,during my last days in ITE,I entered an essay writing competition.I got the news from my teacher that I got 3rd place.

Not too bad,considering that I started 3 days before the deadline and completed the remaining 60% of it,starting only 5 hours before the dealine,submitting in 3 minutes before it passed.

3rd place ain't bad for a rush job.I think it comes with $80 too.I think 1st place gets $150.

Will receive it if I decide to go to the cert ceremony on the 29th.Probably will do so.Wonder who else is going though.

I have class till 1 tomorrow.

I was thinking about it and I realised that I have a non-existent social life.Hardly do anything that is worth shouting about.I know that I didn't have much even with the CCA taking up much of my time but I became so entrenched into it that I adapted,made it work and barely even noticed.

My now that I'm in poly,I realised that my life is pretty boring.It's not numbingly boring,it's just devoid of variety and excitement.

Definitely looking for people who can spice things up for/with me.

Taking a leaf out of an associated blog,I take on the subject matter of friends.

I can only confidently say that the mates back home are friends.And a few others from ITE. Which few I don't quite know,that's the whole point of what I'm trying to say.

I'm wondering about the rest.How many people who've managed to know me for a while consider me a friend?

And I mean a real friend.Not a friend by circumstance but look at me as a real friend.

The word 'friend' has been so tainted.Even someone you just met could be a friend.Wouldn't that be better termed as an acquiantance?

Who are my friends then? Not who I think they are but I'm just asking which ones look at me as one?

Don't get me started on love...today shotgun 'steads' spring up with too much ease.It baffles me how they happen.I've seen an example happen up close so I can talk about it.Thankfully,it's constricted to the public (unfortunately!) minority and mostly a generalisation rather than a commonplace truth.Most of the people I know and in relationships are in it for real and in it for the long run.

I don't really want to continue down the line of making a social commentary.Call me apathetic but I don't care.

I just am of the belief that the word 'love' is being used too freely and loosely. It's being said without much meaning behind it.It's being taken for granted.

I try not to use the 4 letter L word to express it when necessary.

FOR EXAMPLE,(just cos she used to be the 'main' subject)..I would say about Roswell Girl, instead of 'I love you' (cos I don't feel that I deserve the right to use such a sacred phrase cos we're not together,we never were); I would instead say....

"I adore you"

That's my point.

This may not make much sense.But I do try to make my point as clearly and succintly as possible.Whether it comes across clearly that would depend whether you the reader gets it.

And now I bid arrivederci as I go off to get ready for tomorrow's tutorial and start my midterm revisions.

Even if it is a month away.