On A Need To Know Basis

The performance was this morning.Went along well enough.Nice part was when I went down on one knee to act out the queen and the serf scene.Chalk one up for dramatics.

Have very good news to report.I received one of my two scholarships today.Perhaps due to my family's combined level of income,the awarding trustees saw it fitting that I only be awarded half of the stated $1200.But honestly,$600 is a tidy sum anyway.No intention of bragging but rather,I'm just reporting a significant happening in my daily life so please do not misinterpret my intent.

Definitely,the good news is I'll probably get the Hugo Boss colonge and the jacket as well as the shoes.The last one courtesy of my mom.

This thing with Roswell Girl has really got me thinking,too much for my own good.I guess I'm really uncomfortable with the fact that things have been left hanging,like I previously mentioned. Interaction between us have been 'normal'.If I may make an attempt to pinpoint the problem,it may lie in the fact that I don't know how she feels about the letter that I sent her,the one that was a reply,if you will,to the one that she gave to me on my birthday.

I've been toying with the idea of SMS-ing her but somehow,something is holding me back.Am I afraid about she might have to say? Maybe...

But truth be told,the diagnosis may be a case of acute paranoia here.It may be that I'm just overthinking things.I tend to do that sometimes.

But still,there is this fear that I have that while it may be smooth on the surface,there may be feelings and/or thoughts she is hiding.This sort of dishonesty lays the groundwork for,on her part,distrust and rather unfortunately for me,distance.

However,she did write the letter.That in itself an act of openess.

I fear that she may be uncomfortable with something I wrote in my letter but she has chosen to keep mum about it.I hope not.

Better get this issues resolved before I turn into a babbling,discombobulated wreck.